The Stink Bug Post

It’s like the elephant in the room that no one wants to talk about. Or in this case, the million brown, slow-moving beetle bugs that have invaded our homes and lives over the past year. Yes, I’m talking about stink bugs.

At first, I wasn’t surprised by the marmish brown bugs crawling across my desk last fall. I figured they were just another random critter that had found its way through our old windowpanes into the nice warm house. But they kept coming back. I would flush one in the toilet, and three more would take its place. It was like some miniature sci-fi supervillain that would not die.

Then I started hearing the reports. I was not alone in my unending battle against these nefarious brown bugs. They were raging an all out war in the homes and offices of the good people of Western Pennsylvania. Why, they were even making their way into the folds and fabric of my brides’ wedding dresses! And they were winning. Like Charlie Sheen winning.

And then winter descended, and those little buggers began to disappear. I thought it was the end of their brief reign of stinky terror. Surely the cold would sap their existence into oblivion.

But I was wrong. Quite simply…they’re back. With a vengeance. What does this mean for all the brides and grooms looking forward to their wedding day this summer? Well…it means watch out for Stinky.